Bad Weather

Is it completely wrong that I love when hurricane season begins, because I get to watch more news features with Jim Cantore?

Way to go Hanna....Keep coming Ike.

Possible? It Could Happen.

The other week we got into a conversation with Corey's moms about people we found attractive; musicians, movie stars, sports figures, etc. We joked about how some had aged and our interest in them faded because they just became too old. Harrison Ford is a perfect example. Hot as Indiana Jones; not so hot as Mr. Calista Flockhart.

During the midst of the conversation, one of the moms took us by surprise. "You know who else is hot? Kim Possible."

We reached back into our minds to try and remember what movie or band she was in.

"Wait a minute...isn't she a cartoon character?"

She nodded. "Yep, she and Jessica Rabbit are totally doable."

We all laughed on silly it was that she could find an animated character attractive. In a world of utterly hot folks to put on your freebie list, why would anyone pick someone where even the most remote of chances are...well, Kimpossible?

She defended herself quickly and asked if we had ever found a cartoon character attractive. I thought back and realized...shit, guilty as charged.

Every Saturday morning as a kid, my crush would join his friends for an hour of battling the Legion of Doom. With a bulging chest, pecs to die for and a nice form fitting Lycra suit, Aquaman was definitely the hottie of his time. And watch that guy run...woof!

I'm a huge fan of superhero powers, though I seemed to be attracted to the one guy with slightly limited uses. Though skiing on the backs of manta rays is cool, there's not much action one can do if all the danger is land based.

Besides I have a tendency to prune up real bad when in water for long periods of time.

It turns out that in the comic books, my prince did eventually find his bride. I'm sure she could appreciate the aquatic culture more than I, so it's probably better for both of us in the long run.

Did you ever fall for a cartoon character or is that limited to Corey's nut-job parents?

What Can Brown do for You?

I love our new offices. There is a Starbucks in the lobby, a fitness center with TV's in each of the machines and I have a windowed office at the front of the building.

I totally miss our old UPS driver.

Some Like it Hot

My friend Kelly over O for Obsessive at nominated me for Hot Daddy Blogger after my last post.

Seriously, the chance of me even surpassing the two current votes (one from her and one from...well, me) are slim, but hey, it's just nice to be thought of as hot when you're over 40.

Kelly, you rock, girl. Thanks.

Oh Captain, My Captain

There’s been lots of talk through the blogs about Greg leaving the Wiggles. The Wiggles are the staple of most households with kids ages 3-6. Parents talk about them all the time.

However, this was the conversation at our house this morning.

Larry: “We’re watching the Wiggles?”

Me: “Yeah, I’m too tired to generate intelligent conversation with Corey.”

Larry: “This is the Christmas special?”

Me: “Uh huh”

(pause)

Larry: “Is Anthony gay? He’s looks gay.”

Me: “Nope.”

Larry: “He should be. He’s cute.”

Me: “Then he’s yours. I’m all about Captain Feathersword. I think he’s utterly hot.”

Larry: “That’s probably because you have that uniform fetish.”

Me: “Yeah, could be.”

Corey: “What are you guys talking about?”

(pause)

Me: “Doing the Monkey.”

Corey: “Oh okay.”

Zippity Doo Da

We drove up to the north side of the island yesterday. It takes a little over an hour to make the drive, passing through a number of small towns that probably once had a purpose and now have slowly lost the ability to appeal to tourism.

Princeville, the largest town in the north, seems to command the needs of the wealthy. We parked illegally to take pictures at the Princeville Hotel, took a dump in the prestigious bathrooms of the Hanalei Bay Resort and drove over seven one-car bridges to make it to Ke’e beach, the farthest most point on the northwest side of the island. We even found some Banyon trees (??) where Larry pretended to be on LOST. All we were missing was the polar bears.

The main reason for being on this side of the island was our zip lining adventure. Yeah, I know hate heights, but I think it’s important to face some of your fears. That’s why we still have every other Christmas with my mom! (I think they finally stopped reading the blog so she’s fair game again.)

The tour was about 5 hours and consisted of 8 zip lines and one really high rope bridge, the thought of which terrified me most. We had 13 participants and 2 guides. They took us a ‘bunny hill’ version of the zips to get us accustomed to the feeling and taught us how to steer so we wouldn’t get all turned around.

By zip #2, we began riding over the valleys and getting incredible views of northern Kauai. We met another gay guy from CA who happened to have attended my conference in Honolulu. We became fast friends as we promised to collect photos and trade them via email once we returned home.

The bridge was after the fourth zip and precariously perched over this river. I was the last to go and watched each person bounce their way across. Fuck it, I decided, I’m totally doing this. (Truth be told, I didn’t have a choice since we were a few miles into the tour.) But I got on and had the ride of my life. The guide followed me and bounced the bridge a couple times to give it some movement. It was amazing and felt so great to face my fear of plunging to my death. (Drama is never wasted with me.)

After three more zips, we made it to the watering hole and all stripped to our suits and floated on inner tubes while the guides set out lunch. It was so relaxing after an afternoon of cooking in the sun. We rested about an hour and headed back to do our last zip for the day. The rains began as if to indicate the day was ending.

I highly recommend zip lining if you get the chance. And if you come to Kauai, no one does it better (and safer) than Princeville Ranch Adventures. It truly was one of the best parts of my trip.

WARNING: straight men, you may want to the end the story here.

The other best part of the tour of was the scenery we took with us. This hot daddy joined us for the five hours and made the entire trip for me. I told Larry that I was taking the pictures so that my friend Richard could see, but truthfully, they’ve already become the wallpaper of my laptop. (Richard, totally your type with the exception of the wife and kids.) Seriously, this man had the most amazing muscles and washboard stomach.

My friends, this is paradise.