Tuesday, February 07, 2006

Waste Not, Want Not

There are some things about a company that irritate people. Everyone has a pet peeve that drives them crazy. Mine, not surprisingly, has to do with the bathrooms.

There is a cardinal rule that you don’t publicly complain or blast your company in a blog. True I’ve given notice, but this is a protocols that even I don’t break… at least until my accrued vacation is paid out. However this should be safe ground.

Back to the bathroom… every day, somewhere between the hours of 10 and 11:30 am, there is set of papers that mysteriously appear on the floor of the left hand stall. In the men’s room (for those who must know), there are two urinals and two stalls. Strangely enough, one of the urinals is for children and sits about two inches off the floor. By the time your pee hits the porcelain, it splatters all over your pants. I can appreciate handicapped stalls, but someone would have to explain the need for kid-friendly urinals in an office environment.

Curiosity can get the best of me, even in a bathroom. (OK, does that sound weird with me being a gay man?) Anywho… it turns out these print outs are sports pages from the Internet. A couple facts here:

  1. I’m in the infancy of my sports education, but I appreciate that guys enjoy reading these as much as I like the movie reviews.
  2. I may be gay, but I’m still a man. All men love reading on the toilet. Even my three year old is practicing his biological rite as a male.
  3. If work is going to pay for me to enjoy a dump & read, heck who am I to argue?

However, explain to me why the defecator must leave his reading materials? I’m mean, like anyone will pick the papers up and read them after … well, you understand where I’m going with this.

I was relaying this unpleasantly to a female co-worker. There are times that people miss the point of your issue trying to prove one of their own. Sometimes they really miss the mark.

I hate that these sports pages are there every afternoon,” I said
She agreed, “Yeah, it’s gross.
I mean why does he leave them there for all of us to look at?” I replied.
She got angry, “Why does everyone assume that only men watch sports? You know women can enjoy sports too.

Hey, if women want to read sports pages in our bathroom, feel free. Just pick up your papers if you do.


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