The Rite of Passage

This weekend, I finally succumbed to a tradition in parenting I thought just perhaps, the Good Lord would help me avoid: The Chuck E Cheese Party.

Corey has been invited to a few in the past but his moms always took him to those. This year, for his 7th birthday party, he wanted to return the favor. It's like Vegas, Branson and Denny's all crammed into one germ-infested petri dish.

It went smoother than I expected, but then again, my responsiblities consisted of showing up on time. The first hour was games, then 15 minutes of consuming as much pizza, cake, ice cream and soda as possible before returning to the games. Truthfully, eating that quickly and returning to the games threw me into a major sugar rush. My scores were WAY off compared to the first hour.

I think there should be a rule much like swimming that you need to wait one hour before entering the game zone.

That being said, I won over 200 tickets and only pissed off one kid who clearly should have seen I was on a streak and NOT asked to play my Street Hoops game. I'm fairly certain I will not be allowed back.

For all the shit I give Chuck E Cheese, it is an amazing factory of organized crap. How smart to plan 5 parties at once and then only have one rat in costume? Brilliant.

However, my one question is the bathroom designs. The only urinal in the place is about 3 inches off the ground. Not so easy on dad, who consumed 6 diet cokes during the three hours and then had to stand two feet back just to actually hit porcelain.

But then someone installs the paper towels 5 feet off the floor. Seriously? How dumb is that?

Clearly another reason I wasn't about to share my Street Hoops game with some kid who has wet hands.